It’s complicated. Eric and Steve have been friends since Middle School, but they had a falling out the summer before High School. Eric, your son, decided to play football. Steve, my cousin’s son, decided to stick with Tap Dancing. After that, things got tense. Steve still wanted to be friends, but Eric didn’t want to be seen with him.
And then, it came out that Eric was gay. He’d decided not to hang out with Steve because he had… confusing feelings for him. Right now, they’re talking, but Steve doesn’t feel that way about Eric. And Eric’s not sure how he feels. It’s all very confusing, lots of drama.
This is a weird place to ask about all this. It’s kind of private.
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Showing posts with label Sexual Intercourse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sexual Intercourse. Show all posts
January 17, 2010
Which sperms are stronger?
There are several types of sperm. Remember, these are broad categories. There exist many variations inside each type, and each person will probably have more than one type.
Speeders – aka, Swimmers, Jumpers, “The Blitz” etc.
These sperm have an over developed flagellum and an underdeveloped head. They succeed by arriving at eggs in high number before other sperm and then penetrating en masse. Each Speeder has only 2/5ths of the human genome, so obviously high numbers have to reach the egg. These sperm often cause twins or triplets, as well as some weird numbers in between (half-siblings, etc).
Castles – aka, Blockers, Walls, “Linebackers” etc.
These sperm have oversized heads and long, but weak, flagella. They carry a massive genetic payload – enough to impregnate four or five eggs. When left alone, a single Castle can impregnate a female for an indefinite period of time. But this rarely happens. Instead, a large number of Castles will “block” for other types of sperm by forming a plug at the opening. Castles and Speeders work well in combination.
Razors – aka, Scissors, Slicers, “Edwards” etc.
These sperm have normal sized flagella and a sufficient genetic load to fertilize an egg. Their trick is their spiny flagellum. A flock of Razors can shred sperm from competing males simply by swimming by. They also, sometimes, rupture defensive Castles. These sperm are very efficient, but there are draw backs. Fratricide is a major problem. They’re also not as fast as Speeders. And then there’s the risk of lacerating the egg beyond repair. This is where many birth defects originate.
Of course there are other kinds, Burrowers, Spies, Clowners, the “Sheep”, Slinkies, Sickles, Whooping Sperm, and the infamous Walken Strain. None of these are as significant as the Big Three, mainly because they’re adapted to very specific battlegrounds. In environments where obstacles such as condoms predominate, for example, the Burrowers are obviously at an advantage.
Again, most people have a combination of different types. Debates over which combos you should choose still rage in scientific circles. Popular archetypes in the current metawomb environment include the One-Two Punch (Castles blocking for Speeders); the variant, the One-Two Donkey Punch; and the Walken Surprise, which combines the offensive power of Razors and Burrowers with the X-Factor of the Walken Strain. Consult your doctor on which combo is right for you.
Read more!
Speeders – aka, Swimmers, Jumpers, “The Blitz” etc.
These sperm have an over developed flagellum and an underdeveloped head. They succeed by arriving at eggs in high number before other sperm and then penetrating en masse. Each Speeder has only 2/5ths of the human genome, so obviously high numbers have to reach the egg. These sperm often cause twins or triplets, as well as some weird numbers in between (half-siblings, etc).
Castles – aka, Blockers, Walls, “Linebackers” etc.
These sperm have oversized heads and long, but weak, flagella. They carry a massive genetic payload – enough to impregnate four or five eggs. When left alone, a single Castle can impregnate a female for an indefinite period of time. But this rarely happens. Instead, a large number of Castles will “block” for other types of sperm by forming a plug at the opening. Castles and Speeders work well in combination.
Razors – aka, Scissors, Slicers, “Edwards” etc.
These sperm have normal sized flagella and a sufficient genetic load to fertilize an egg. Their trick is their spiny flagellum. A flock of Razors can shred sperm from competing males simply by swimming by. They also, sometimes, rupture defensive Castles. These sperm are very efficient, but there are draw backs. Fratricide is a major problem. They’re also not as fast as Speeders. And then there’s the risk of lacerating the egg beyond repair. This is where many birth defects originate.
Of course there are other kinds, Burrowers, Spies, Clowners, the “Sheep”, Slinkies, Sickles, Whooping Sperm, and the infamous Walken Strain. None of these are as significant as the Big Three, mainly because they’re adapted to very specific battlegrounds. In environments where obstacles such as condoms predominate, for example, the Burrowers are obviously at an advantage.
Again, most people have a combination of different types. Debates over which combos you should choose still rage in scientific circles. Popular archetypes in the current metawomb environment include the One-Two Punch (Castles blocking for Speeders); the variant, the One-Two Donkey Punch; and the Walken Surprise, which combines the offensive power of Razors and Burrowers with the X-Factor of the Walken Strain. Consult your doctor on which combo is right for you.
Read more!
Labels:
Health,
Mr. Red,
Sexual Intercourse,
Trolling,
Womens Health
August 29, 2009
Why does my girlfriend get pain and burning after sex without condom that leads to an infection as it never happened with other guys before me and las
Why does my girlfriend get pain and burning after sex without condom that leads to an infection as it never happened with other guys before me and last I did without condom was 2 years before her?
This is quite a mystery. There are a few things that can cause burning and infection, but I'm not sure which is the culprit here. We'll go through them...
1. An STD - This was my first instinct. There are several types of STD's that cause no symptoms in men but really mess up women. The problem is, you haven't had sex without a condom for 2 years. After two years, all of the STD particles should have been washed off, gone stale, or moved on to another host.
2. You're uncircumcised - If not properly cleaned, the area under the foreskin can accumulate bacteria and other infectious agents. If your girl's previous liaisons were all clipped but your doberman still has his ears, that could be the problem. If this is the case, thoroughly cleaning the muzzle of your gun might work.
3. Food - If you and your girlfriend use food (whipped cream, peanut butter, scotch, pickles, etc) in the bedroom, this could cause a burning feeling and infection. But you didn't mention food and the problem only occurs when you don't use a condom, so things are more complicated than that.
Here's what I think is going on. Your girlfriend eats things throughout the course of the day. Then you two get together and she performs oral on you. Unfortunately, she doesn't brush her teeth first. You have unusually wrinkled skin on your man bits and this skin retains particles of food. Then, you two get it on without a condom, so the bits of food and rammed into her love dungeon. Instant burning feeling and infection.
Mystery solved.
Read more!
This is quite a mystery. There are a few things that can cause burning and infection, but I'm not sure which is the culprit here. We'll go through them...
1. An STD - This was my first instinct. There are several types of STD's that cause no symptoms in men but really mess up women. The problem is, you haven't had sex without a condom for 2 years. After two years, all of the STD particles should have been washed off, gone stale, or moved on to another host.
2. You're uncircumcised - If not properly cleaned, the area under the foreskin can accumulate bacteria and other infectious agents. If your girl's previous liaisons were all clipped but your doberman still has his ears, that could be the problem. If this is the case, thoroughly cleaning the muzzle of your gun might work.
3. Food - If you and your girlfriend use food (whipped cream, peanut butter, scotch, pickles, etc) in the bedroom, this could cause a burning feeling and infection. But you didn't mention food and the problem only occurs when you don't use a condom, so things are more complicated than that.
Here's what I think is going on. Your girlfriend eats things throughout the course of the day. Then you two get together and she performs oral on you. Unfortunately, she doesn't brush her teeth first. You have unusually wrinkled skin on your man bits and this skin retains particles of food. Then, you two get it on without a condom, so the bits of food and rammed into her love dungeon. Instant burning feeling and infection.
Mystery solved.
Read more!
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