August 23, 2009

Give an assay on Do undo others as you would others do undo you?

Sure thing. Here's what I've got:

The principle "Do undo other as you would others do undo you" is sometimes called the Golden Rule. Every society has some version of this commandment. Confucius once said "Act unto man with the honor due to you." In the Torah, this commandment is stated as "As you would desire be done unto you, do so also." The Koran has a similar law.

The Golden Rule is interesting from a sociological perspective, but it's more interesting on a personal level. How can I, as a member of modern society, follow this rule? I lived an entire day following this rule and noted some of the results.
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At the beginning of the day, I woke up and ate breakfast. I was going to have cereal, but some drank the last of the milk and didn't replace it. I was going to go stomp some heads, but then I remembered my essay on the Golden Rule.

Instead of violence, I used a note to express my displeasure. I left it on the refrigerator so that whoever keeps drinking the milk will read it. I wish I knew who it was. I live alone; this whole thing's starting to freak me out.

Next I went out and got the mail. It was nothing but junk. I was about to throw it away, but then I remembered the Golden Rule. If I'd written someone a letter, I'd want a reply. I sat down and wrote letters to each of the companies. I thanked them for their brochures but said I couldn't afford any of their products at the current time.

That made me late for work. As a result, I was going to speed on my morning commute. But that's dangerous, so I slowed down and followed the Golden Rule.

I showed up half an hour late for work. My boss yelled at me until he was red in the face and then fired me. I thought he was being unreasonable, but if I'd just yelled at someone and fired them, I'd want them to act sad. So I turned on the waterworks and begged for my job. It didn't work.

That left me lots of time for lunch. I went to a diner and got a grilled cheese sandwich. It was horribly burned and the waiter was snotty. But I might be too, if I were a waiter, so I left him a big tip to try to cheer him up.

After lunch I went out to get in my car. Someone had side-swiped it. I looked around the parking lot and noticed an SUV with a suspicious my-car's-color paint smear. I thought about calling the police.

But if I'd hit my car, I'd be hoping to sneak away. I decided to play along. When the owner of the SUV came back a few minutes later, I smiled at her and winked. She gave me the middle finger.

On my drive home, I was careful to be as considerate of other drivers as possible. Everyone else was rudely passing an old woman going 35 in the middle lane. But I hate it when everyone passes me, so I played along and drove behind her. I got rear ended, but the driver rushed away. I remembered my experience at the diner and went with it.

When I got home, the note on my fridge was gone. In its place was a tersely worded letter claiming that I was squatting in someone else's house. I pay rent, so I'm pretty sure this isn't true. The person who wrote the note said he liked to watch me sleep and if I didn't leave soon, I'd be sorry.

It sounded like he needed some space. I understood, sometimes I need space too. So I decided to drop in on my girlfriend.

I don’t like it when she comes by unannounced, so I called her on the way. She picked up but she seemed kind of out of breath and flustered. I told her about my day and said I really needed to talk. She didn't sound excited about me coming over. But sometimes I'm not excited about her coming over for one of our "talks" and I let her anyway. So I figured it probably wouldn't violate the Golden Rule to go over.

When I got there, this guy was pulling out of the driveway. He drove a real old, beaten up car and he wasn't wearing a shirt. Naturally, I started to assume the worst. But then I thought, I'd like my girlfriend to give me the benefit of the doubt, so I should do the same for her. The man must be a handyman.

I went inside and found my girlfriend naked in her bed. The sheets were all messed up. I asked her what happened and she said she'd had a bad dream. I said it was kind of late to be sleeping and she said the dreams had kept her up all night. She looked really upset.

I was starting to get suspicious again until I remembered the Golden Rule. When I'm upset, I like it when she hugs me. So I got into bed with her and we cuddled.

As we were cuddling, her eyes kept going to the closet door. When I looked at it, I could see someone moving around inside.

I hate being stuck in closets. I tried to imagine what it must be like for the guy hiding in the closet. Probably super awkward. I mean, my girlfriend's naked on the bed.

I got up and opened the closet. A naked man jumped out, punched me in the face and ran away.

I thought the punch was mean but, in his position, I might have done the same. I was going to chase him, but then I remembered the Golden Rule. If I’d just been doing some other guy’s girlfriend and then he found me in her closet, I’d be super scared and want to escape. So I closed the closet and got back in bed with my girlfriend.

I was mad, but I tried to imagine what it would be like if I was cheating on her and she caught me. I’d feel really bad if she was heartbroken. I’d rather die than hurt her like that and watch her cry and yell and scream. So I strangled her.

As you can see, a day following the golden rule was a truly enlightening experience. It changed the way I think about driving, eating in restaurants and treating members of the opposite sex. I think all of us could profit from a day strictly following the Golden Rule.

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